BBC One: 28/12/94, UK Gold: 14/12/00,
Mark tells Annalise that he's going to enter the Charity Quest. Debbie rudely tells Len to get out of the Dark Ages. Mark decides to make the world's longest sausage roll. Brett tells Debbie he's having lunch with new student Sassy. Gwen warns Michael to warn Helen to keep as far away from Len Mangel as possible.
At Erinsborough High, Sassy comes down the stairs with Squirrel and Packo, complaining about how her boyfriend Stonie just wanted to watch kickboxing for their three month anniversary. Packo and Squirrel sympathise with her, saying that all guys suck, and Packo tells her to just dump him. Danni then appears, and Sassy asks her if she can set her up with Brett. Danni says that she's not very good at matchmaking, but Sassy warns her that, if she wants to be part of their gang, then she'll do it.
At the newsagency, Michael arrives and explains to his dad what happened when he went to Len's old place to drop off his jacket, and met Gwen. As Philip listens, he starts to wonder if it might just be sour grapes on Gwen's part, but Michael insists that it's the truth - the woman lost all her savings and had to sell her house. He tells Phil that he has to warn Helen, but Phil doesn't believe that Helen will appreciate anybody interfering in her relationship. Michael says that he might be right, but what if it all goes wrong and Helen then blames Phil for not warning her in the beginning.
At number 30, Mark is on the phone to Gaby, finalising the details for his longest sausage roll World Record attempt. Annalise comes in, wearing her dress for the Charity Quest, and he finishes his call. She tells him that he might as well give us on his plan to enter the beauty contest too, as he'll never win, but Mark reminds her that it's sexist, and it's about raising money for charity, not winning. He then takes another call, but Annalise continues to tell him he's wasting his time, and starts playing with his hair and annoying him as he talks to a journalist about covering his world record attempt. As he tells the journalist his slogan - 'Bucks not beauty' - Annalise laughs.
Ar number 24, Lou is marking a ring around his birthday on the calendar, telling Cheryl that it's only a couple of days away and nobody's even said anything. Cheryl calls him a big kid, and says that if he's good, mummy will buy him a lovely present. Lou gets excited, but Cheryl admits that she hasn't got much time, so she'll have to take him shopping for something. He then asks if she's planning a party, but she says that she hasn't got time, with work and the charity quest. She offers to take him out to dinner that night, and Lou is disappointed.
At the high school, Sassy, Squirrel and Packo approach Danni as she stands at her locker. Sassy asks if the date's been arranged, and Danni says that Brett will be at home that night, though she hasn't really spoken to him. Sassy says that she'll come for dinner, with candles, but Danni isn't sure what Lou and Cheryl are doing. Sassy tells her to get rid of them, and thanks her. The girls walk off, leaving Danni worried.
That evening at number 26, Phil has told an unimpressed Helen about what Gwen Childs said. Helen thinks it's just nasty gossip from a bitter woman, but Phil reminds her she hardly knows Len, and that he ran out on his first wife. Helen is losing her patience, but Phil says that Gwen might be right, and Len might run off with Helen's savings. Helen points out that Phil also took advantage of her, as she sold number 32 to get him his position at Lassiter's, which he then gave up to run the newsagency, without even consulting her. She says that she invited him and Julie into her home as her guests, and they, and the children, have all been rude and disapproving towards Len, and it's simply not good enough.
At number 24, Danni is setting the table for a romantic meal, when Cheryl comes in and asks why she's using the best glasses and china. Danni ignores her questions, while Lou and Cheryl leave to go late night shopping for his present. Lou is still annoyed that everyone's treating him so badly, but they leave. Brett then asks why the table looks so fancy, and asks if Danni is expecting someone and he should leave. Danni, however, says that she's the one who should be going, as Sassy comes in, leans over a shocked Brett's shoulder and says 'Hey there sexy'.
At the pub, Lou is distinctly underwhelmed by the new shirt Cheryl's bought him, though she says he'll look like a million bucks in it. He struggles to hide his disappointment, but feels like a fool when Cheryl asks if he was really expecting a new car or a trip to the Bahamas. She says that they'll have a lovely meal, and then she might have a surprise for him at home, but his face drops when she says she'll give him a massage. She looks around, grinning, and says that there's a good crowd in the pub tonight and Lou asks again why they can't just celebrate on his birthday. She reminds him that she has an important function that night, and asks him what he wants for dinner.
Back at number 24, Sassy and Brett have finished dinner, and he nervously gets up to clear the plates as Sassy continues to try to seduce him. He runs off to the lounge room to put some music on, and Sassy asks for something soft and romantic. He tells her it's all Danni's grunge music, but he has to stuff in his room. She says she'll join him, but he tells her his mum would kill him - Sassy reminds him that his mum's not there, and puts her hands on his shoulders. He tries to keep her talking, but she leans in and kisses him.
The next morning, Cheryl and Mark at in the Lassiter's complex, where he's calling on people to donate as he prepares to start making his giant sausage roll. Phil comes along and pledges $20, and Phil says that it looks like he's trying really hard. Cheryl calls over that Mark's managed to raise $1400 so far, but then Phil asks what they're going to do with the sausage roll once it's cooked. Mark admits he hadn't thought about that, but Cheryl says that she'd be willing to buy it, for $500, and have to delivered to Ramsay Street for Lou's surprise birthday party. Phil jokes that it might just be long enough to fit all the candles on.
At the school, Debbie overhears Sassy talking to Packo and Squirrel about how her date with Brett didn't go well, as he's the innocent type, but he won't be by the time she's finished. Debbie walks over and tells them to get to class, but Sassy laughs at her, saying she's just jealous because she stole Brett away from her. Debbie laughs it off and walks away from them.
At the newsagency, Helen is buying a magazine and Phil tries to give it to her on the phone, but she says that she would prefer to pay. Phil says that she needn't be like that, as he was only trying to help, but Helen points out that he was interfering, and has been ever since Len came onto the scene, so they're going away on a holiday together. She walks out, and Phil looks taken aback.
Back at the school, Debbie finds Danni and asks if Brett really likes Sassy. Danni confirms that he does, and asks why he wouldn't, to which Debbie replies that she's feral. Danni says that Sassy's her friend, and Debbie blew her chance with Brett. Debbie jokingly calls her a cow and walks off, only to overhear Sassy arguing with Stonefish. Stonie asks Sassy if there's another guy, and she doesn't deny it. Stonie tells her that there'd better not be, or he'll kill him. Debbie takes this in, and runs off.
At number 30, Mark meets with Hilda Brown, one of the organisers of Miss Erinsborough, and she admits that she's intrigued, as they've never had a male entrant before. He explains that he's raising funds for the paralympians, and hands over his entry cheque for $2000. Annalise then arrives home, and Mark introduces her. As the two women chat, Annalise explains that she only has $500 raised for the Red Cross, and Hilda tells her she has two more days to get her $2000 in, or she won't be able to enter the paegant.
At the newsagency, Annalise is shaking a tin, trying to get people to donate. Phil turns her down, saying he's already donated elsewhere.
Annalise then arrives at number 24, but Lou says he was cleaned out by the Walk For Want.
At number 26, Debbie tells Annalise that she doesn't approve of beauty contests, while Michael laughs at her.
At the pub, Cheryl gives her $10, and Annalise is delighted.
Back at number 24, Brett says he's still paying off Cheryl's credit card.
Back at number 26, Helen gives her some loose change.
At number 30, Annalise counts up her collection of money and realises she has nowhere near enough. Mark comes in and Annalise asks him to make up the rest of her money, as he's raised stacks and wouldn't miss it, but he says that the paralympians would miss it, and it wouldn't be fair.
At number 24, Debbie arrives, looking for Brett. Danni explains that he's out, but she's not sure if he's with Sassy. Debbie tells her about the conversation she overheard, and that Stonefish seemed a bit strange. She says that she thinks Sassy is just using Brett to make Stonie jealous, and he should be warned before he comes to harm. Debbie tells Danni to do it, as she's the one who created the whole mess.
At number 30, Annalise realises she only has $545. She then spots some of Mark's CDs and has a plan to sell them, but he comes in and catches her, though she claims she wasn't up to anything.
At number 24, Brett arrives home to find Danni panicking. She says that they need to talk, but he says that he has to go and meet Sassy, and she won't take no for an answer. Danni grabs him and tells him that he can't go, she explains the situation with Stonefish and says that if Brett goes, he's going to get beaten to a pulp.
At the newsagency, Debbie is telling Phil how Julie won't let her change schools. She says that, since the Waratah kids arrived, everything's changed and she can't concentrate in class. Phil asks if that's all that's troubling her, and she then admits that there's a guy, but she doesn't want to get involved as she fell so far behind when she was involved with Darren, so she just wants to get as far away from the problem as possible. Phil tells her that sometimes you need to tackle problems head on.
At number 30, Annalise is counting her money and is up to $800. Mark comes home and is impressed with how much she's made, but says he just dropped by to get some CDs to take to Paulo's. As he realises that half of his CDs are missing, Annalise admits that she sold them to raise her charity money and Mark is annoyed, but she tries to calm him down by giving him a hug, though he insists he wants his CDs back.
Brett and Sassy are sitting outside the coffee shop, talking about Stonefish, when the man himself appears. Stonie grabs Brett and tells him he's history, as Sassy sits and smiles to herself.
Featured Regular Characters: Danni Stark, Brett Stark, Philip Martin, Michael Martin, Mark Gottlieb, Annalise Hartman, Cheryl Stark, Lou Carpenter, Helen Daniels, Debbie Martin
Guest Cast: Anthony Engelman as Stonefish, Brooke Howden as Squirrel, Verity McIntyre as Packo, Defah Dattner as Sassy, Helen Milte as Hilda Brown
• First appearance of Anthony Engelman as Stonefish, who would go on to become a regular character later in 1994, and have his family, the Rebecchis, introduced in early 1995
• Stonie was part of a group of new students who arrived at Erinsborough High, when the school merged with West Waratah Tech. Other bizarrely-named new faces included Packo, Sassy, Squirrel and Butza
• Mark is a fan of Louis Armstrong and Sammy Davis Jr
• Helen mentions Nell Mangel, telling Philip they "were never friends"